Two non-binary kink and sex educators have explained how “spanking therapy” can help you work through negative emotions and trauma.
Non-binary sex worker and sex educator Corey More and non-binary queer-inclusive kink educator Lateef Taylor told Healthline exactly what spanking therapy is, and how it can help people.
Spanking therapy, the educators said, can be used to process negative emotions, work through trauma, create feelings of release and help people explore their potential.
“Just like all therapy, for it to count as spanking therapy, you have to go into it with the intention to move through something,” said More.
The therapy requires skill, and is usually performed by sex workers. Taylor said: “There’s a difference between slapping someone’s rear end willy-nilly and spanking therapy.”
More added: “There are a plethora of incredibly skilled sex workers who specialize in BDSM… some of whom only do spanking.”
Spanking is not always about pain, said More, and the reason it can have such a profound effect on someone’s emotions is that it can lead to a release of endorphins.
They said: “Spanking can be incredibly erotic, freeing, and powerful when done in a controlled and consensual environment.
“When you’re feeling flattened by life, spanking therapy can be a way to remind you of the fullness of your humanity and the joy of life. It can bring you back to your inner fire.”
Taylor explained that the act doesn’t always have to be about sex: “There’s an intimacy there, of course, but it isn’t necessarily sexual.
“You don’t go see your physical therapist because you want to have sex with them. You see them for a specific kind of release.”
Of course spanking can be practiced with a partner, but the sex educators said that it’s best to learn from an experienced spanker to reap the full rewards of spanking therapy.
Taylor said: “Just as you wouldn’t go into talk therapy with your partner [as your therapist], it’s best not to try spanking therapy with your partner.”
Any BDSM experience should always happen with a foundation of clear and honest communication and consent, including discussing what you want to get out of it, your limitations and boundaries, and verbal and nonverbal safe words.
“The more you communicate before the scene starts, the more likely it is that you’ll get what you want out of the scene,” More said.
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